My son lost his dad very suddenly last year – he was only 57. It was very traumatic for my son who was only 22 at the time (his dad and I divorced 11 years previously). His dad didn’t leave a will and there were a lot of complications with the estate, and practical issues to sort out – my son (understandably) wasn’t dealing with it all very well. He was also moving into the house he’d inherited and there was a lot of ‘stuff’ he’d also inherited which needed to be sorted out – like brand new clothes to sell (so many of them!).

It was coming up to my busiest time at work and was also a crunch time for my son dealing with his dad’s estate, so I considered my options. I could ask for a sabbatical, but the policy was that you needed to give 4 months’ notice. I thought of resigning, leaving and finding another job further down the line but was persuaded by a couple of people to ask for the sabbatical and much to my surprise it was granted. I was so grateful to my managers for the support – they knew that I was really struggling to deal with this and that it would only get worse. They sorted out someone who could cover my workload and we had a thorough handover, so I felt like I was leaving my work in good hands – which was important to me.

Photo by Crew on Unsplash

What was my plan?

I wrote out a list of things that needed to be done with the estate – I then had a weekly meeting with my son to go through the list and send emails/sort stuff out online. E.g. deal with the solicitor, sort out putting his dad’s car into his name, send in the documentation for the pension accounts and so on.

I thought that it would be important to have a schedule, and to keep some kind of routine. I had a list of things I wanted to do daily – eg going to the gym, 15 mins housework, putting stuff for sale on Vinted etc. I wasn’t very successful with sticking to the list.

I knew I would be living to a strict budget which I hadn’t been great at doing up to that point. Not being paid for three months would have a big impact on my savings.

I also wanted to make sure I spent time with family and friends. I felt it was important to keep that social contact going, as I would miss being in touch with people daily while not working.

How did I spend my time?

First things first – I had a 10 day cruise booked just before my sabbatical started. I was back from that on 30 April and my sabbatical started the next day. That first morning I woke up feeling a bit guilty about work but I gave myself a talking to – I wasn’t being paid, and they had someone to cover my work. And, more importantly I needed this time for my son. I have to say, that was the first and last time I felt guilty about not being at work!

My first job was to sort out my airing cupboard! This had been bugging me for weeks and only took about 20 minutes to tidy and organise. I find that things that cause ‘friction’ in my daily life really need to be addressed before I can start to deal with the major issues! The lesson here is that things you’re putting off probably won’t take as long as you think

I was focused on helping my son – there was a lot of stuff that needed sorting out for the solicitor, and also I wanted to help clear his house of his dad’s stuff. I spent time emailing the solicitor and meeting with her, and also researching one of the issues my son was dealing with related to the estate. There were lots of things to do like close accounts, set my son up with his bills for his house, work out what to do with his dad’s car, and sort through a lot of the stuff that was in the house.

I had thought I would sell the clothes on Vinted but quickly realised it was way too big a task. I sold some stuff and then arranged for the rest to be taken by someone with their own eBay shop who agreed to sell and take a commission. Since then I’ve also had a bit of a sales spree on eBay and Vinted of my own stuff – decluttering and making a bit of money.

Photo by Sarah Brown on Unsplash

I also spent some time reviewing my finances including my pension funds. I set up a couple of debit cards so I could allocate some money from a couple of my spending categories, to try and control what I was spending – so, a card for grocery shopping and petrol and a card for my personal spends. This worked really well!

My son, his partner and their dog and I had a family caravan holiday for a week, along with a group of friends which was really good fun – it was great to spend time with my son, his girlfriend and their dog as well as everyone else.

I also went to Cornwall to visit my cousin for a few days. I never usually get time to do this in the summer unless it’s August which is NOT a good time to visit Cornwall if you don’t like sitting in lots of traffic!

My son moved out during this time, and now I’m an empty nester. It feels really odd to be truly living on my own after living with my son for his whole life. There’s a whole other blog post in that!

I also booked two more cruises – one for the end of November (a transatlantic crossing to Miami) and one in March 2025 in the Caribbean meeting up with two friends I met on my Celebrity Mediterranean cruise in 2023. I love having something to look forward to!

How did I feel?

That feeling of freedom was amazing. Knowing that my time was my own, and I could decide what I wanted to do and what I didn’t want to do.

It made me realise that having time freedom was really important to me, and that’s when the focus on my finances kicked in, so that at some (hopefully near) future point I could realise my dream of easing back on paid work and having more time to myself, and to pursue other interests.

Photo by Becca Tapert on Unsplash

What do I wish I’d done differently?

I gave myself a huge list of things to do which looking back was unrealistic – and I felt like I hadn’t achieved much because there was still a lot of stuff left on the list. However, when I looked at what I had achieved, it was incredible. I do wish I’d prioritised the list more, and broken the tasks down into smaller chunks – like selling on Vinted and eBay

I really wish I’d been able to establish a regular gym habit, but I had a lot of joint and pain issues during that time.

I do wish I hadn’t spent so much time on social media! Although I did discover a UK based blogging group on Facebook which I’m hoping will inspire me and be my tribe.

What did I learn?

Time away from work gives you breathing space

It’s very hard to try and get your son to engage in the sadmin that comes with sorting out their dad’s estate

I don’t want to be constrained by my working hours/pattern – for example it’s very difficult for me to take holiday in January and almost impossible in the summer

Being on a tight budget really helps you to manage money better

I’m better off than I thought and I (used to) spend a lot of money on stupid shit!

I can spend less money on groceries and still eat well

I need to stop having a ‘lack’ mindset and spending money on ‘cheap’ stuff that doesn’t last

I don’t think I’m quite ready to ‘retire’ – yet!

How did it feel going back to work?

August is a quiet month for us so there weren’t as many people around to notice I was back. Because we don’t work in the office a lot I’m not sure many people realised I wasn’t around – and my sabbatical was organised in a rush so there was no big announcement.

It was odd at first and I felt a bit resentful of being back to the grindstone – but I felt a lot better about it when my August salary hit my bank account!

What is my plan going forward?

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

Now I’ve reviewed my finances, I’m going to move my pension from an advisor where the fees are eating away at my pot into more passive income funds

I want to build a regular savings habit and add to my S & S ISA, and investment account

I want to establish a side hustle; build on my eBay/Vinted business and look into other ways of making extra money

Although I’m not ready to ‘retire’, it has got me thinking about whether I’m in the right job and what that might look like going forward

There are still things to sort out with the estate, and I’d like to get that wrapped up as soon as possible.

Tim Ferriss came up with the phrase ‘mini retirements’ in ‘The Four Hour Work Week’ to describe a three to four month ‘break’, typically to travel (but you can also ‘find’ yourself) – these are a wonderful way to help you to take a step back from work, and breathe. Although what I did doesn’t fit strictly into this description, it was enough for me to recharge my batteries and re-evaluate where I am and where I’d like to be.

The post I took a three-month sabbatical from work – what did I learn? appeared first on Who moved my coffee?.

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Improving the quality of your life is something many people aspire to, particularly at the start of a new year, or new season.

This involves taking intentional actions and developing positive habits. In this post, we will explore five habits I feel contribute to a more peaceful, less frantic life!

Mindful money

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For quite a lot of my life, I didn’t think about ‘managing’ my money – and it slipped through my fingers. When I was pregnant, I really started to prepare for life with the baby – practically in terms of equipment and so on, but also by preparing my finances. My husband and I were in debt, together with a mortgage and we chose to pay off our debts by remortgaging the house. We did have a fair bit of equity so at the time it wasn’t an issue. From that day forward, I have rarely been in debt other than a mortgage (and I am working hard to pay that off!). It feels good to be in control of my money rather than my money being in control of me. My income and expenditure is tracked using You Need A Budget (YNAB), and it’s great to see money building up in my budget categories. I also recently discovered the FIRE movement (Financial Independence, Retire Early), and have taken my first steps to becoming financially independent by selling my home for the last 8 years and buying a cheaper one – in doing so, I realised some of the equity and reduced my mortgage amount and term. My aim is to be mortgage free by the age of 60. Being mindful about your money is as simple as tracking your income and expenditure, and being aware of your ‘money pitfalls’ – where do you spend money unnecessarily or frivolously (looking at you, Amazon )?

You could start by keeping track of your spending over the next month or so – either in a spreadsheet or using a notebook. Try and identify where you aren’t spending money mindfully, and where big expenses (such as car insurance) seem to hit you unawares – hint; you could be saving an amount every month towards an annual expense! At the end of the month, categorise your spending and check whether there are any areas where you could cut back without affecting your quality of life. Remember to check your bank statements too. Planning in time to regularly check in on your spending habits (I mean every couple of weeks or so) will pay off over the long term as you refine your spending habits. This can then lead to you creating financial goals, and investing for wealth and long term growth.

Learning

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All my life I have loved learning – even when I didn’t love school! Having a curious mind keeps the fires burning, and keeps you open to new ideas, meeting new people, and doing new things. It has spurred me on to enter jobs in different careers, at times in my life when ‘people’ might think that having a new career wasn’t attainable – but by fostering a love of learning I was able to move into a new job and hit the ground running. I was able to quickly pick up the technicalities of a new role, and by being open to learning new things I was soon learning how things worked.  Looking forward to being financially independent, and in a position to retire ‘early’, for me, means more time to learn and grow – to do the things I have never had the time to do – to travel and experience new cultures and meet new people. Not to stagnate in my chair watching daytime TV!

There are so many opportunities to learn – and the internet is a great enabler of this. Through the Covid lockdown, many institutions made courses available that were free of charge (MIT, LinkedIn, Google Digital Garage  and there are many platforms which are relatively inexpensive that have short courses and training sessions – Skillshare, Udemy,  for starters. I’m also a great fan of podcasts, and reading. Both of these are great ways to learn. I use Spotify for my podcasts – and they’ve now added audio books to the platform too! It’s a brilliant way to learn while you’re doing something else, like driving, travelling or maybe gardening or housework.

You could use these new skills to improve your career, or to start a side hustle. Or you could just learn for the love of it – and it will improve your cognitive abilities too.

Clean your space

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Having a clean and tidy environment has always been important to me – except when I was a grotty teenager. My mum, bless her, never had being clean and tidy high on her list of priorities, and maybe I grew up with a slight obsession for cleaning as a result of that? Who knows.  My cleaning style has changed over the years – originally I did a massive cleaning session once a week, usually on a Saturday or Sunday, effectively taking out a large portion of my weekend. Having a baby hugely impacted on my ability to have a clean and tidy home; even though I was home I felt like the place always looked like a bomb had hit it – and my husband did not do his fair share of the housework. I remember my sister telling me it didn’t matter whether I had a clean home as long as the baby was happy – and that is true. However it’s also true for me that cleanliness and tidiness are important for my mental health. If my space gets messy and dirty, I start to feel out of control, and things will quickly start to slip elsewhere too (keeping on top of daily admin, my diary, and even paid work).

Having some control over the cleanliness of my space soothes my mind, makes me feel in control and enables me to extend that control to other areas of my life. If you can keep your space clean there are many other benefits too, including improved focus, releasing endorphins and regulated emotions, according to this Forbes Health article.  I am now managing my cleaning and tidying on a daily basis – I used to think that my house would never look clean if I did it daily rather than in one go, but I couldn’t have been more wrong! And it means I never have to spend half a day during my precious weekend doing the housework.

You could start small with this; one popular way is to ‘shine your sink’ and make sure that last thing at night your kitchen space is tidy so when you get up you are not greeted with a mountain of dirty dishes. Another small habit is making your bed daily – for me this is essential – it’s for future me to appreciate when it comes to bedtime!

Sleep time

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I must admit, I am still working on this one.  I am a bit of a night owl, and I can be exhausted all day long but come 9pm and I will suddenly wake up and want to do all sorts of things, with the underlying feeling that sleep is for wimps. Of course I regret this the following day, when I have to drag my ass out of bed at 6am, but somehow that is never top of mind the night before. I have to be quite strong and force myself to go to bed by a certain time, and not to over stimulate my mind so I can’t get to sleep.

There are many studies which show how important sleep is to us – in many ways not known before, including its effect on our weight for example. I know myself that when I am tired I make very poor food choices; even when I know I am doing it it’s so hard to stop. It’s much harder to concentrate during the day, with that feeling you’re wading through treacle.

One way to start could be to have an ‘early’ night once or twice a week – being in bed by 9pm. An hour or two before bedtime, put your phone down and don’t look at it again before bed. Make your bedroom a sanctuary; soft lighting, comfortable sheets and blackout blinds! If your mind is too busy to sleep, try writing down anything that comes to mind so it’s on paper and not in your head. Another strategy is to give your mind something to do by counting backwards from 10,000 – although this hasn’t worked for me yet! One thing I have successfully tried is using a meditation app like Headspace – listening to the soothing voice of the narrator during a relaxation session has never failed to send me to sleep.

Alone time

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Blaise Pascal –‘All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.’

I think I’m an introvert with extrovert tendencies. Whilst I have many friends, and love spending time with them and (most of the time ) meeting new people, I also need time alone to recharge my batteries. I enjoy my own company, and I am quite happy pottering around my home or shopping on my own.

I believe it’s important for everyone to spend time on their own, and to get to enjoy their own company – how can other people enjoy your company if you don’t enjoy it yourself?! Being self-sufficient is a skill, and a habit worth cultivating.

Of course, this needs to be balanced, and for me I need to ensure that I don’t withdraw completely. Even if sometimes it feels like I have to force myself, I will say yes to things that I really feel like saying no to – and I have had some of the best times by doing so. For example, going to Alt on my own in 2020 was a huge, scary experience, but it was one of the best things I have ever done in my life. I gained confidence in myself to travel alone, to meet new people and be able to talk to them – and make new friends. Since then, I have done five solo cruises and had a ‘whale’ of a time (get it? )

To start to enjoy your alone time, you could take a walk on your own a couple of times a week – saying hello to people you meet along the way. You could start a yoga practice – Yoga by Adrienne is a great resource for beginners and experts alike. Alternatively, a creative hobby is a great way to spend time alone – like painting or knitting. Visiting the cinema on your own is also a great experience – you can choose exactly what you want to see and go when you want to go!

Developing habits that will improve the quality of your life is something that doesn’t need to take a huge amount of time – the key is to start small and then build. These 5 habits are really important to me – but to be honest I could have mentioned 5 more that I’d like to adopt! What habits do you have that have made a difference to your life? What do you think about the habits I’ve listed?

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The changing of the seasons, the loss of those warm, long days (if we’ve been lucky enough to have sun here in the UK!) and the nip in the air that tells us Autumn is on its way. The change of each season reminds me that nothing is forever, changes up my thinking, and gives me a fresh perspective.

I love change, after a period of stability – no-one loves living in a constant state of change do they?! – and the changing of the seasons gives an opportunity to reset, or bring some changes to different areas of my life.

I’ve just returned to work at the beginning of August from a three month sabbatical (see this post) and honestly, it’s like I’ve never been away! It’s going to be busy from now to the end of the year with my workload, but I do have a couple of holidays booked to look forward to!

Here are some of the things I do to feel like I’m having a fresh start each September:

Planning – is it too early to mention the C word?! Winter is coming, and with it the holiday season, and it’s time to start thinking about Christmas and getting a jump on present planning! I also like to plan activities in so that I have something to look forward to – like an upcoming holiday.

Wardrobe changeover – it always seems to happen so quickly; the weather one day is warm enough for sandals and summer dresses, and the next you need your boots and sweaters! Packing up your summer wardrobe and getting out your winter clothes is an annual ritual, and rediscovering clothes you love (hello boots that I’ve had for 10 years!) is a lovely feeling!

Changing up your recipes – time to start cooking up the soups and casseroles that are a staple of the cooler months. There is nothing better than having a meal in the slow cooker all day that you just need to serve up when you get home!

Hobbies – my favourite sport of ice hockey starts up again in September after its summer break. I love having the summer off (and tbh the season often outstays its welcome by April, if the team hasn’t played well…) but it’s great to be back in the rink watching a fast-paced sport and catching up with friends. Each season brings fresh hope that the new players have an impact and improve the team’s performance.

Making my home cosy – I love the ritual of going round and closing the curtains and blinds, and cocooning myself in my home. Deep throws, plump cushions, candles and soft lighting all make me feel safe and warm.

What are some of the ways you welcome in the start of Autumn? Let me know in the comments!

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First thing to do (if you haven’t already) is to declutter – don’t pay to move stuff that you don’t need – or worse, that you don’t have space for in your new home. I’ve got a blog post about preparing your home for sale which has some useful information in it about decluttering.Essentially you need to prioritise getting rid of ‘big’ stuff that you don’t want to take with you – for example, that old exercise bike that is cluttering up your garage. And don’t forget about places like sheds and lofts! These are the most likely to have stuff in that you’ll get rid of or donate.

Packing your stuff up

Start to do this early!! You could start packing up your pictures and ornaments first, as you don’t need those frequently – but you’ll probably still be packing up your kitchen the day before you move, as you use it on a daily basis.

You can buy your own boxes from specialist websites or even from Amazon. Make sure you have enough (good quality) tape, with a proper tape dispenser, and a supply of markers to identify the box contents or labels. You’ll also need something to protect any fragile items during the move like bubblewrap or strong paper – I used this wrap from Amazon. I used these labels last time I moved – I stuck one on the top and one on the front of each box, together with writing on the number of the box. I then put one label on a piece of A4 paper which I stuck to the door of the relevant room in the new house and all the removal team had to do was put boxes with the corresponding colour labels in that room. Genius.

An idea I had last time I moved was to number each box, and keep a separate list and a photo of what was in the box rather than write the contents on the box itself. I had a small whiteboard, and when I finished loading the box up I wrote the number on the box, wrote the contents and the box number on the whiteboard, and took a photo of the whiteboard on top of the open box. Then I sealed the box up, labelled it and put it to one side. The next box then has the next number, and so on. This worked really  well, as I didn’t have to search through piles of boxes to find the one I wanted – I just looked on my phone until I found the right box number. I organised the photos of boxes into a separate folder on my phone for easy access.

My method for recording the contents of my moving boxes

(patent pending )

When packing up the TV or any complicated electronics, take a photo of the wires and connections before disconnecting any of them. Saves a lot of messing around and trial and error when you’re setting them up in the new place!

When you’re packing up clothes on hangers, you can keep them on the hangers, and put them into large black bags, with the hangers at the top (outside the bag). This protects them during the move.

Finding a removals service

You can ‘DIY’ your house move and rent a van, but I really wouldn’t recommend it unless you are moving out of your parents home for the first time (and therefore have very little in the way of ‘stuff’). It takes an awful lot of strength and energy to move the contents of a home, and there is a lot of skill involved, in wrapping up your precious belongings and making sure they arrive at the other end with no damage. When looking for a removal firm personal recommendation is best but if you need to, look at reviews. They will want to come round and look at your contents to see how long it will take, how many vans will be used and therefore how much to quote. You won’t be able to book them (without potentially losing your deposit) unless you have a firm date for moving. They might also provide a packing service at additional cost, which may be of use to you.

Organising the services

Next steps – you will need to organise the utilities at your next place (gas, electricity, broadband, phone line, TV provider, water) as well as home insurance and changing the address on your car insurance. You’re responsible for insuring the new property from the date of exchange of contracts! You’ll also need to let your current providers know that you’re moving. Organise for your post to be redirected to your new address by filling in the online Royal Mail form.

Take your meter readings on the final day (take a photo of the meters) and remember to take a reading of your new meters on your first day (again, a photo).

Find out from the estate agent how you will get the keys to the property on moving day (and from your own agent how the new owners of your old home will get theirs!).

Handing over to the new owners

Prepare a handover list for the new owners – you could ask the owners of the new home to do a similar list for you. This should include useful information such as where the meters are, what day the bins are collected, the names of the neighbours, any particular maintenance arrangements for equipment you’re leaving behind, and so on. I’ve created a checklist for a handover list that you can download for free here.

If you’ve had a good relationship with your buyers, it’s nice to leave them a ‘welcome’ gift like a bottle of prosecco (with a couple of glasses) together with your handover list. And of course you should clean your home so it’s ready for the new owners (and hope that the owners of your new home have done the same for you!).

Moving day essentials

Prepare your moving day essentials box and overnight bag in the week before you move. The box should include toilet roll, kitchen roll, some cutlery, plate, mugs/paper cups, coffee and so on.

Have any valuables (jewellery, passports, important documents, laptop) with you in your car.

Your overnight bag should include phone charger, medicine, toiletries and clothes for overnight.

Pack up your duvets and pillows into large bags and they can then be unpacked in your new place once your beds have been put in place. These bags from Amazon come highly recommended.

Unpacking at your new home

It will probably be chaos, with people moving boxes and possessions in! Be on hand for any questions from your removals people about which furniture goes where.

First priority should be to get  your kitchen unpacked with the basics and make sure everyone in your home has a bed to sleep in by bedtime – quilts, pillows, sheets etc.

Remember to take photos of your gas and electricity meters for your first reading.

If you’re working, make sure (if you can) that you book a few days off after the move, to try and get yourself unpacked as much as possible. In the first few days, do your address change notifications; for businesses, many of these can be done online, or you may need to call. Remember to tell your friends and family your new address.

Some key tips:

• If you live with others, spread the load. It shouldn’t be down to one person in the household to get everything packed up, and all the admin done
• If friends offer to help pack (or unpack, at the other end) boxes – do not, under any circumstances, say no!!
• Start to prepare for the move earlier than you think you need to. There is an awful lot to get done, and you need to fit this around your current life and commitments
• In particular, declutter early, and before you start packing!
• Planning is key – have lists, add to them, cross things off – just use them! They will help the whole process get out of your head, and onto paper
• Keep in touch with your solicitor, and the estate agents involved, throughout. Dates can change, people can do strange things, curveballs can be thrown. Keep yourself informed.

Finally, remember to take some time for yourself after the move – it will probably have been highly stressful, potentially emotionally draining, and almost certainly physically exhausting! Don’t try and get everything unpacked and pictures up in the first week – prioritise the essentials like your kitchen and bathroom, and somewhere to relax each evening. And enjoy your new home

The post How to move to a new home with less stress! appeared first on Who moved my coffee?.

Location and budget

You may have already decided on the area you want to look in, and you should also have a budget in mind. Think carefully about whether you really need to spend more money than you currently do on a home – there might be one in a ‘less desirable’ area, or an up and coming area that will cost way less than one where prices are at a premium. For example, I sold a house that was in a good location, and was also relatively new (less than 25 years old), and moved to a 100 year old house in a cheaper location that cost £60k less (which actually had more square footage, and more character). This enabled me to pay a big chunk off my mortgage, reduce the term by a couple of years, and still have money left over to make some significant improvements to the new house. And I love it – I’ve put my own stamp on it by making structural changes that I couldn’t afford to do in my previous home (although it did need it). Many property experts will say location is the most important thing – and it is important; I wouldn’t buy a house next to an industrial site for example, BUT don’t write off ‘cheaper’ areas without visiting them and looking at what they have to offer – you could find a new home that is perfect for you!

You might also be looking at buying somewhere that needs renovating – if you are handy, and don’t mind living in potential chaos for a few months while the work is going on, this can be a good way of buying a home lower priced, but in a premium area. It also has the advantage that you can design it how you’d like it, so this could be an option for you.

What do you need in a new home?

Think about how big your house needs to be – if you’re a growing family, then space is going to be very important. If you’re single, or it’s just you and one other person, less space is probably fine. Don’t make the mistake of looking for somewhere bigger because you have a lot of stuff – sort your stuff out first and declutter, and you might find you have enough space where you are! Plenty of resources are available to help you to declutter – try How to GYST here on YouTube – loads of decluttering inspiration!

If you are sure you want to move, think about what you are looking for in a new property – number of bedrooms, location, parking arrangements, space for a home office etc. I found it helped me to have a note of these (the Notes app is good for this) so I could keep them top of mind when looking.

Get yourself onto mailing lists and set up alerts on the major house sites like Rightmove and Zoopla. Put in the area you are looking in, the type of house/flat and price range and you’ll receive alerts as new properties come onto the market.

Have a look round the area – is there a particular agent with a lot of properties for sale? If so, get yourself on their mailing list or better still, develop a relationship with one of their staff so they think of you and give you a call when a property comes onto the market.

Viewing properties – what to look for

When you see a house that you might be interested in, look at it with your head and not your heart! It can be easy to get carried away and dream of living in a property that looks fantastic in the photos before you’ve even visited it (I know – I’ve done this!). However, and this may come as a big shock to you – the photos can be very deceptive. They are (usually – if the owner has done their job properly with preparing it for sale – see my previous post about this ) designed to show the property in its best possible light. Photos may be taken at ridiculous angles to make rooms look bigger, the room may not have much furniture in it – again to make it look bigger. Space is the name of the game – as well as location.

Look carefully at Estate Agent photos, descriptions, room plans and measurements. I once viewed a house that had an awful kitchen that clearly needed to be upgraded, and it was only whilst viewing that I remembered there had been no photos of the kitchen on the agent’s website. If there had been, it would have put me off – clearly a trick by the Agent to get people through the door. I have also viewed houses where the size of the kitchen looked deceptive on the floor plan, and in reality was tiny and unworkable. If you can, try and check the measurements beforehand against your own home’s measurements – seeing that a kitchen is 10ft by 8ft on a floor plan may not flag up an issue to you, but if you compare it to your own kitchen which is a similar size and you think is too small for you, it could stop you wasting your time viewing a house that wouldn’t be right for you.

If good schools in the area are important for you, make sure you check out the latest Ofsted reports for the schools in that catchment area. However, take care not just to rely on these reports – they can be several years old, and are only ever a snapshot in time. Head teachers and Senior Leaders that were responsible for that particular rating (whether positive or not), may have moved on since then and things changed drastically. Try and visit the school, and talk to parents whose children are there. Asking for opinions on Facebook is an option, although be prepared to receive wildly differing views!

Is it important to be near to shops, or green spaces in your new home? Go around the area and check it out.

When you are viewing, take someone along with you. If you are buying with someone else, then obviously take them – but if you’re buying on your own, take along a friend. Preferably one that is willing to give you the honest truth about their view. However, remember the things that are important to them may not be to you – they might not like somewhere as it has terrible wallpaper – but you know you will be redecorating anyway so that doesn’t matter so much. However, they might pick up things that you miss, so it’s definitely worth having a second opinion.

Ask questions about the neighbours, the parking etc. I knew the house I was interested in was near a local primary school so I asked about parking. The owner said (truthfully, in her defence) that she didn’t know if it was an issue as she was out at work. It turned out it can be a problem, as it gets very busy and people don’t care where they park, including across my drive! I had to suck it up, and realise it didn’t matter to me so much, as the chances of me needing access to my drive at school pickup or dropoff times was minimal.

If you’re buying an older home, look carefully at things like the electric sockets and light switches – upgrading the electrics is an extremely messy job that will cost a lot of money. Look at the roof from the outside – does it look in good condition? Have neighbours upgraded theirs – this could be a sign that yours will need doing at some point. Having a decent, functioning roof is very important – especially in the UK where it rains a lot!

Are the windows double glazed? How old is the glazing?

Is the kitchen suitable for your needs? You can replace a kitchen, but again, it’s an expensive job. Same with bathrooms. That’s fine if it’s factored into the price and you’re happy to do the work – but if not, then you need to think carefully about taking the property on!

It might be important to you to be within a certain travelling distance to work – if so, then try your commute one day – at the time you’d normally travel, obviously!

Also, visit the house at different times – for example at the start and end of the day; also during the day if you are going to be at home a lot.

Look at the house(s) that are neighbouring the one you’re interested in. Are they well looked after? I found a lovely house that I would definitely have offered on, except the neighbouring house was in a terrible state, with decaying window frames, and an unkempt garden. With that, you don’t know what sort of neighbour you will have – and if they aren’t taking care of their home, that sends out the wrong signal.

The ’C’ word…..Compromise!

We all start off with a wishlist of our perfect home, and somewhere along the line we have to compromise.

No ‘new to you’ home will ever have every single thing that is on your wish list. For me, having a drive, three bedrooms and some outside space was very important. I had to compromise by buying a terraced house (with neighbours both sides) rather than my preferred semi-detached (neighbour only on one side). This meant that I don’t have easy access to my back garden (e.g. bringing in new plants, or having the bins there) as I have to use a side entry that is next to my neighbours house. It also means it’s more noisy than only having a neighbour on one side – but that was the compromise I was prepared to make, and I’m still happy with it.

It helps if, before you start looking, you have an idea of what you are prepared to compromise on – it’s been said that you should only compromise on the things you can change – for example, décor, kitchen or bathroom style. You can’t pick a house up and move it to a different area, so maybe location is one area that you aren’t prepared to compromise on. It helps if you have an idea of this at the start of your search.

Hopefully this has given you some helpful guidance to find a new home that’s perfect for you – comment below if you have any tips of your own!

The post How to find a new home that’s perfect for you! appeared first on Who moved my coffee?.

First things first – buckle up – this is probably going to be a tough journey! Many things can go wrong, many people or organisations will probably frustrate you so it’s important to go into it with a calm head, and accept that things will probably go wrong at some point. Managing your house sale is essential, and good friends can help out here by being a sounding board, or by offering you practical advice and support!

Legal representation

You can actually take on the legal responsibilities of selling your house yourself, but you will need a lot of time, be the sort of person who thrives on detail, and be really persistent. It’s not something I would ever do, having sold three properties and had a solicitor each time – it’s well worth the money.  You can use a solicitor, or a firm of conveyancers to deal with your sale (and purchase, if you’re buying somewhere new). It’s highly recommended to use the same firm (I would say essential) to manage the sale and purchase. The buyer will of course also have a solicitor, and the two firms should be in contact with each other regularly through the process.

If you use a solicitor, it’s really important to ensure you use one who is experienced in conveyancing. Again, personal recommendation is best – if you can’t get that, then do your research online by looking at reviews, post a question to your friends on social media, ask work colleagues. This decision is another one which is one of the most important to get right! And unlike estate agents, it is not easy to change solicitor once you are in the process, and there may well be fees to pay if you do change – a new solicitor will probably want to conduct new searches rather than use any searches from the first one. Fees can vary enormously; there will be statutory fees such as searches etc, but the firm will also make a charge for their services.

There can be lots of things that go wrong, or go slowly with solicitors, whether that’s using local firms or using online specialist conveyancers. Not processing things as quickly as they should, not being contactable or replying to emails, and in some instances not actually knowing the right thing to do! I think this is one area where your research will be invaluable – but not foolproof. I think there is a lot to be said about using a local firm – if only because if things get really bad you can at least turn up on their doorstep to speak to them – and of course going into the office is easier to sign documents, etc.

What does the solicitor do?

In a nutshell, the solicitor (or conveyancer) does the legal work to transfer ownership of your property. When you are selling, this includes dealing with your buyer’s solicitor and fielding any enquiries from them, checking how your buyer is funding their purchase, send you forms to complete about your home (fixtures and fittings list, property information form) and so on. They will also liaise with your mortgage provider to obtain a redemption statement, if you currently have a mortgage on your home. This will state how much is owed on your mortgage (the redemption figure) as that will need to be paid to the mortgage provider once the home is sold. Your solicitor will transfer those funds once they have received the money from your buyer’s solicitor.

You can prepare for the sale process by getting your important house documents together – e.g. installation certificates for double glazing, certificates for electrical work, any paperwork if you have had an extension or building work done, as these will probably be requested by the buyer’s solicitor.

The fixtures and fittings form lists all the items associated with the house (garden shed, kitchen cabinets, light fittings etc) and you will go through it and indicate which ones you are leaving and which ones are not included. The property information form asks about what work you’ve had done to the house, whether it’s ever been flooded and so on.

When you are buying a new home, the solicitor will conduct the required searches (such as check a mining report, a water company search which checks if you are in danger of being flooded etc), check the title on your new property (e.g. that the person selling is actually the person who owns it!), ensure you receive the fixtures and fittings and property information forms, forward on any queries you may have and identify queries of their own; e.g. if there have been alterations to the property, making sure these were all done legally and with the appropriate checks.

They will be liaising with your mortgage provider (if you’re having a mortgage), or they will check with you about your source of funding – to ensure they are complying with money laundering legislation. The solicitor will also arrange for the deposit to be paid at exchange stage (which usually comes from your mortgage deposit) and will arrange for the funds to be transferred to the seller and the mortgage provider on completion of the transaction. They will manage the risk if there is an issue such as a sewer under your property (which happened to me!). This may involve you purchasing indemnity insurance or asking the seller to buy this. They will ultimately make sure you actually own the correct property!

A key piece of advice is to get to know the person managing your account, and build a relationship with them if you can. In fact this applies to the whole process – building and maintaining relationships is key.

Keeping on top of things

From my experience, the really important thing to do is to keep on top of your solicitor and your estate agent. Although their job is to follow the process through and deal with things in a timely manner, in reality they will be managing many other transactions at the same time, and yours won’t rise to the top of the priority list until you are near to exchange or completion. Your sale or purchase is not as important to anyone else as it is to you. A regular call (fortnightly/weekly) to the estate agent, and the same to your solicitor, makes sure that things are progressing as they should. Once you are further through the process, a weekly (and potentially daily!) call may be needed to make sure everything is moving along. Keeping a short record of the calls/emails is very useful, just jotting down the date and brief details of what was discussed/agreed. If you need to do anything, make sure you do it as quickly as possible – for example if you need to find a copy of an invoice you had for some work done on the house, or if you need to speak to your solicitor about a query that your buyer has raised.

I learned this the hard way, when during the first few weeks of my own house sale/purchase, I assumed my solicitor was conducting the searches because I’d transferred the money to them. What had happened was that the transfer had one digit missing from the reference and so the funds hadn’t been applied to my account. The solicitor hadn’t chased me up or identified that these funds belonged to me, and therefore did nothing. It was only when I checked in two weeks later that I found nothing had happened. Lesson learned!

Exchange and Completion

Once all the forms have been returned, the searches are in and the queries from each solicitor dealt with, the legal forms should be drawn up ready for exchange of contracts – once you have signed a contract and this has been exchanged with the buyer they’ve paid the deposit, both sides are legally committed to go through with the transaction. If the buyer pulls out, you can keep their deposit. If you pull out you may be sued.  Completion of the sale happens at a point to be agreed between both parties – this can either be the same day as exchange (very stressful!) or between 7 and 28 days after exchange. The day the property sale completes is the day your buyer owns your house, and obviously this means you must leave it. You are legally obliged to comply with the information you gave to your solicitor about what fixtures and fittings you are leaving and which you are taking with you – don’t suddenly decide to take all the light fittings if you said you were leaving them behind!

Managing the sale process can be a very stressful time, as well as the potential emotional impact of leaving somewhere you have lived, possibly for a number of years. I hope the information I’ve included has given you some helpful advice to make it a smoother process overall!

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My preferred order of doing things is selling your house before buying somewhere new – looking at what’s on the market while mine is being marketed, of course. This is because until I’ve sold, I won’t know how much money I can spend on my new home – especially in a fast-moving market. And even if the market is slow, selling before looking for somewhere to buy makes sense, because you don’t know how long yours will take to be sold. So, the first step is to find out how much you can market your house for.

How much is it worth?

If you’re in the UK you can use a website called Zoopla to have a look at what your house value might be. It’s (at the time of writing) free to review and uses data from various places including the Land Registry; it has different sections such as homes for sale or for rent, and also usually gives a history of the previous sales (this is especially useful when you’re looking to buy somewhere). Find the section ‘House Prices’ and put your postcode in to select your home and it will give you an estimated value range. You may need to register with them (free of charge at the time of writing – July 2022) to get the exact price, but you can see the range without registering. You may also have some local knowledge, for example if a house was sold recently (within the last few months), the price may not yet be on Zoopla but you might know what it was marketed at and have a guess at the sale price. Knowing a rough sale price will help with selling your house, and also to manage the discussions with your estate agent.

Marketing the house

Next, you need to find an estate agent. I would always say personal recommendation (preferably from more than one person) is the best way to go. I have always found that agent commissions are round about the same percentage, but the way they work and their efficiency can vary hugely. You need to consider aspects such as whether to go online only (can be cheaper but less personal), whether you want the agent to manage the viewings or whether you’re happy to show people round, and the sort of package on offer. Check out their website and see how easy it is to navigate – what are the quality of the photos, and of the written description. This is the way your potential buyers will see your house so it’s important that it looks professional. Make sure the agent lists their properties on a popular house selling website to ensure greater market reach – in the UK that’s probably Rightmove, and also Zoopla.

Do you think they’ll do a good job of marketing your home? Many will have varying levels of marketing – for example they may include a virtual tour on their website, there may be a physical brochure etc.

Check whether you have a minimum contract period – if things aren’t working between you, it’s good to know you can get out of the contract fairly quickly (6 weeks is usually the minimum).

Getting the right agent is one of the most important things to do in the sale process – if they are working properly for you, the whole process becomes much, much simpler!

Choosing an estate agent

Once you’ve got a list of two or three agents to speak to, make an appointment for them to come and value your home and tell you what services they offer. They will look round your home and ask you questions but should also have done some research before that point on local sales prices. Ask questions of them such as what is included in their fee, why they’ve valued your home at that price, have they any knowledge of your area, whether you can approve the photos, whether their admin team follow up with potential buyers after viewings for feedback etc.

You don’t have to make a decision on the spot – take time after you’ve seen all the agents to consider what they offer and then make your decision. Make sure you go back to the agents you decide not to use to give them your decision – it’s polite to do so and anyway they will only chase you up if you don’t! And if things don’t work out with the one you choose you might decide to go back to one of them.

The agents’ role is obviously selling your house, but as part of that there are many things they will do. They should have knowledge of the local area, and may even already have some potential buyers on their database that would be interested in your house. They can advise you on what, if anything, you need to do to prepare your home for sale (I’ve written a blog post about that – here).

The role of the estate agent

They will market your property, and this will be the biggest part of their job. Photos will be taken (you need to make sure these present your house as well as possible whilst being accurate), and they may do a video so that a virtual tour can be done. This is useful for buyers who may be moving into the area but currently live some distance away. Some produce leaflets with your details on (called ‘particulars’), and all should have a website on which your home is presented.

Once they’ve prepared all these details, you should check them and make sure they are correct before they are published. They can also arrange for an Energy Performance Certificate (EPC) to be issued (at a cost), but you can also arrange this yourself independently, which may be cheaper. EPCs are valid for 10 years, so you may already have an existing one, which you can check here.

One of the key things that the agent will do is check out any potential buyers. They need to make sure they are serious potential buyers; have they got a property to sell? Is it on the market/sold? Are they first time buyers? What is their source of funds to pay for the house? Do they have a mortgage agreement in place (‘in principle’)? This is to ensure you don’t get any time wasters – some agents won’t even let you view a house unless you have sold your own house already or are a first-time buyer with a mortgage agreement in principle.

Most agents will offer to show prospective buyers around your house as part of the service. Where possible, I ask the agent to show buyers round the first time they view, but for any second viewings I prefer to show buyers myself. This is because at second viewing stage, they are more serious (and there’s fewer of them!), and they will often have questions the agent can’t answer – what are the neighbours like, is parking an issue, how old is the boiler etc. It’s important to say at this point you should give honest answers! Don’t say your neighbours are fantastic if you have had disputes with them, for example. You are legally obliged to tell your buyer if you have had a dispute with your neighbour – once you have sold, you have to complete a property information form and one of the questions is about whether you’ve had any disputes.

What else will the agent do?

The agent should be following up with people who’ve viewed your home to get feedback, and to check if they want to put an offer in. This is a vital part of the process, as it can give you objective feedback on what people think about your home – which may not be what you expect them to say!

The agent will also negotiate the best price for your home. You should already have had the conversation about likely sale price (which may not be the same as your asking price). Depending on the current overall market and in particular your local area, this may be below asking price, at asking price or above asking price. It’s true that ‘a house is worth what someone is prepared to pay for it’!

Once an offer has been made and the sale agreed, your agents’ admin team will spring into action. They will be in contact with the buyer to find out their solicitors’ details, who their mortgage firm is, what their position is in the ‘chain’ and making contact with them regularly to chase things up. A ‘memorandum of sale’ will be issued which outlines the sale price, and the buyer and seller details, plus the solicitor’s details for both sides. The agent will also be in contact with your solicitors, chasing them up when necessary.  

The estate agent plays such an important role in the process – they are the ones who can be in contact with everyone in the chain – from your buyers and solicitors, to the agents of other properties in the chain. Making things happen smoothly and quickly is key to getting to the different stages such as exchange of contract, and completion, and the agent keeps the ball rolling on this. It’s in the agents’ interests to work as hard as possible as they receive a fee based on what the house sells for (usually – rather than a fixed fee) and they only get paid if the house sells.

Selling your home can be a stressful experience, but having the right estate agent will make it much smoother for you.

The information in this post applies to England and Wales and is correct at the time of posting (July 2022)

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The whole experience can be stressful, but if you prepare well there are ways to make the process more manageable by being organised and having a practical approach.

The first tip I’ll give is an emotional rather than practical one, and that is to try and keep the process business-like, removing as much of your emotional connection as possible. Once I had made the decision to move, I tried to view my house as someone else’s – I also tried to keep in mind that the house I was moving to was ‘only a house’ until we had completed on it, and actually moved in. This helps to ensure you are dealing with the transaction on a business level, rather than getting emotionally involved. This is important so that you don’t feel attached to your home, which may then cloud your decision-making. If you’ve decided to sell, for whatever reason, it’s best to think of the house as a product that you are selling that you want to get the best price for!

So, when preparing your home for sale, there are several key areas to tackle:

Decluttering

Depending on your general attitude to ‘stuff’ this can be a huge beast to tackle! I try and keep on top of clutter day to day by having a box ready to throw things in for charity as and when I come across them. However, putting your house on the market requires more than tinkering around the edges. One good tip is to go round your house and take photos of each room from different angles; it’s surprising how a room that we look at every day can look totally different in a photo – and you can more easily see the problem areas, and have an idea of what you might need to get rid of. And don’t forget any less-used areas such as lofts and garages, garden sheds! Before you make a start, make sure you have an ‘exit plan’ of how you will be getting rid of stuff – for example, book in at the local tip (dump), make sure there is a charity shop willing to accept your donations (both of these were tricky during lockdown), and identify friends and family who may be interested (e.g. in furniture or books etc). I was fortunate enough to know someone who would be moving home, so there was a fair amount of stuff put to one side for her! You could also ask a kind friend to help you with this – getting rid of clutter can be an emotional minefield, and it can be difficult to let go of items. Someone who can kindly but firmly prise that childhood sports trophy out of your hands will be hugely beneficial (they really will!).

Prioritise what you have identified as needing to be decluttered into the big stuff that will make a difference (e.g. getting rid of some old exercise equipment that is taking up space), and the stuff that is good to do but won’t make a huge difference (emptying drawers). And then make a start on getting rid of the priority items! If you do it over several days, make sure you are moving stuff on every couple of days or so – that way you can really see the benefit of what you are clearing as you go through the process, which should help keep you motivated.

If you need a bit more motivation, I can highly recommend my friend Laura’s YouTube channel How To Get Your Shit Together, where there are so many really helpful videos about decluttering; it’s an absolute goldmine.

One of the key things that people want from a new home is somewhere to store their ‘stuff’ – and if yours is overflowing, they will think there isn’t enough room.

Repairs and cleaning

Once you have cleared your clutter, you can see the basis of your house. It’s a good idea to then do a room-by-room ‘snagging list’ which is a list of all the maintenance tasks that need to be done to bring your house up to scratch. For example, I had a dent in a wall where a door handle had gone into it, and also some loose plaster where I had a radiator fitted. Both of these were tackled with some filler, then repainted. There was also some paintwork which needed to be refreshed, and the outside paintwork needed a good clean. Before you start, go round each room and look at it with a critical eye, trying to see it as a potential buyer would – take more photos if needed. What are the things that you would spot, if this wasn’t your home? Is there peeling paintwork? Are there chips in the woodwork? Remember the garden too, or any outside areas you have – does anything need to be fixed? You may need to get a professional in, and you need to weigh up the cost of doing this against whether you would get the benefit of it in the house price.  For example, if your house needs a fair bit of modernisation (new kitchen or bathroom for example), then the estate agent may market it as ‘in need of modernisation’’ and price it accordingly. This can help to ensure that you don’t get potential buyers who will be disappointed at the scale of work needed.  On the other hand if they are relatively minor (repainting your kitchen from the blue colour that you love to a more neutral cream), then you can do them yourself. You need to weigh up at the end of the day which changes will make it easier to sell your house. I have seen so many houses where clearly the owners have not bothered to even tidy up before having the photos done, and whilst the house may be lovely, and perfect for someone, if they can’t see past that untidiness then it will take longer to sell. On the other hand, don’t (as my ex-husband once wanted to do) plan to rip up your garden and re-lay the path with stepping stones because it looks nicer, if what you already have is perfectly serviceable. There are many ways you can update your house at a very low cost, even the kitchen and bathroom, if you put in the effort. Have a look on YouTube at ‘kitchen or bathroom renovations’ either ‘low cost’ or ‘rental properties’ for ideas. There are absolutely tons of them on there, all you need is some imagination. Pinterest is also a great source of information.

Then you need to go round and clean your house from top to bottom. Even if you already have a good cleaning routine, you need to up your game! Look up; are there any stray cobwebs? Do your skirting boards need a good clean? When was the last time you cleaned your windows? All of these things will make a difference, and you’d be surprised what buyers notice! A beautiful house can be ruined if it looks dirty, and the time you put in will be well worth it.

Kerb appeal

How your house looks when buyers arrive is really important – it’s said that buyers make a decision within a few minutes of arriving and walking through the door whether they will buy. Tidy up the front of the house – get rid of any weeds, sand down and re-paint any peeling paintwork on any fences or gates; depending on the time of year some seasonal pots or hanging baskets will help – cut your grass if you have a lawn. Clean your windows, take down any stickers that your kids may have stuck on. Make space in your hall so that buyers aren’t fighting through a pile of coats or shoes to even get into the property. Make sure there are no unpleasant smells – I wouldn’t recommend spraying air freshener everywhere as it can put people off and also be very cloying on your lungs, but some pleasant scented candles, or some strategically placed essential oils can help. Having fresh air circulating is really important – make sure your windows are open for a few minutes at least every day to get fresh air in. If you have any pets, there may be pet smells that you need to deal with – a (kind) friend will be able to tell you if your house smells even slightly ‘pet-like’, as you may be used to it. If you have carpets it would be worth looking into getting them cleaned – you can hire carpet cleaners and do this yourself to keep the cost down. Make sure pet food isn’t sitting around uneaten and causing a smell, and wash pet blankets and beds. Not everyone will love your pets as much as you do!

Finishing touches

Before you get the estate agent photos done, it’s time for the finishing touches. Go through your house room by room and de-personalise it; remove any photos of the family, any knick knacks that might have been made by the kids at school, any stray leaflets or letters from school that are stuck on the fridge door. This can be a really difficult thing for people to do, because they are still seeing the house as their home, and quite rightly in your home you want to have personal items that bring you pleasure. What you need to remember is, not to think of it as your home when it is on the market. View it (if you can!) without emotion because if you still think of it as your home, it will be difficult for other people to imagine themselves living there – and they can’t easily do that if your house has photos of your family everywhere. Finally, if you don’t already have them, some nice plump cushions on the sofa, some throws draped over the end of the beds, and lovely fluffy towels in the bathroom (along with fresh soap and toothbrushes tidied away!) are really good finishing touches. I even bought shampoo, conditioner and shower gel in a complementary colour to my bathroom tiles when I was selling my house (it worked )!

At this point, you’re ready to get your estate agent in for photos, and to write a complimentary, factual description of your house ready to present it for sale. Hopefully by now, you are seeing your house presented in a way that will appeal to buyers, and will enable you to achieve the best possible sale price that will help you move on to your next home.

You will need to keep it tidy once it’s on the market, for when you have viewings – but decluttering will help you keep on top of this enormously. This all seems like a lot of work, and at times you will wonder whether it’s all worth it. Remember your end goal – you want to be able to move on to your next home, and for the house that you’ve lived in to be presented beautifully to enable you to achieve the best possible price. Be positive; remember the good times you’ve had, appreciate what your house has done for you, and prepare to move on!

I’ve put together a checklist of the key areas for preparing your home for sale –  it can be downloaded free here.

Good luck with selling! Let me know below if you found these tips helpful, and please add any of your own!

The post Preparing your home for sale appeared first on Who moved my coffee?.

1 – Money

I’m talking about this first because I feel like it’s the most important thing. If you’re worried about your money, it will impact on other areas of your life. Getting to grips with your money can be a big job if we are talking about EVERYTHING to do with your finances – but here, I’m going to concentrate on the basics. The first thing to do is get yourself a baseline – how much money is in your current account, how much is due to come in and how much is due to go out? Once you’ve established that, if you haven’t already got one, I suggest you set yourself a budget – you don’t need to be too specific here, but general budget headings of what your expected costs are and what income you expect will help you understand whether you are living within, or beyond your means. A great app that I use is You Need A Budget It’s free for the first 34 days, after that it’s $99 a year (it’s American, so that’s about £73 depending on the exchange rate). That’s quite pricey, and there are free alternatives available (such as Money Dashboard and Emma – which is free with paid options), or you could make your own spreadsheet. The key is finding one you will use and that suits you. Once your budget is established, you need to ensure you keep it updated with what you are spending, earning, and saving – so set a time every week when you will sit down and update it with what has happened over the past week – and balance it to your bank accounts. If you keep on top of things this should take you no longer than 20 minutes or so weekly. Every month, you can then (if you want to) review how your overall budget is going, whether you need to tweak any areas – for example, did you spend more on groceries than you planned? Have you got money left over in your ‘social spends’ category? Decide what to do with these categories (especially any overspends) and prepare your budget for the following month. If you are checking in on your budget every week, you will feel closer to your money, and much more in control.

2 – Laundry

Ah, the never-ending pile of laundry – whether it’s washing to be done, sheets to be dried or clothes to be ironed, it never seems to be finished! Well, making a routine out of doing it (several times during the week if necessary) means that this task becomes less overwhelming. This, along with cleaning, is one of those tasks that is very visual – a bulging laundry basket or overflowing ironing pile is a very obvious reminder that you do not have your s**t together with the washing! Breaking it down over more than one day helps to stop this feeling of overwhelm. If you have a big family (or even if there are only two of you and one is a young adult son who plays ice hockey….#justsaying), doing it more than once over the week is absolutely vital. If not, it can take up a whole day and you will be heartily sick and tired of it by the end and vowing never to touch it again (until the following week!). Have a routine whereby you wash and dry sheets on one day, towels on another, light coloured clothes another day, darks on another – or even go mad and do two loads in one day! If you have a washing machine with a ‘delay’ function, this magic little button can REALLY help you feel like you are on top of stuff – simply load up the machine before bed, set it to come on an hour before you get up and then bingo, washing is all waiting for you when you stumble into the kitchen to get your morning coffee….

The key is to do the washing, drying, and putting away on the same day – and the putting away doesn’t necessarily have to mean ironing it – I mean to fold and put away anything that doesn’t need ironing. If it needs, ironing, pop it into the ironing basket. But you do need to plan one or two days when you will actually do the ironing. Keeping the ironing pile to a reasonable level means that it doesn’t become overwhelming in itself. A couple of ways to deal with this could be – declutter your clothes, and buy less stuff that needs ironing, and often if you hang something up to dry, it won’t actually need to be ironed. Bonus!

3 – Meal planning

This is kind of one that links in with budgeting – after housing costs, the biggest cost for most people is their weekly food shop. If you are not on top of having something prepared (or even just thought about), you will spend money on extra groceries, takeaways or a surprise meal down the pub. Plus, having a plan in mind saves having to make a decision about what to eat when you’re probably at the end of a busy day and have decision fatigue, which often leads then to buying takeout or eating something unhealthy.

The first thing to do is find out where you are at with your current food stocks – so again, forming that baseline or starting point. Check what’s in your fridge, throw away the mouldy stuff lurking at the back of the shelves or in the salad drawer, check the use-by dates on what’s left and make a note of them. Then check your cupboards – put ‘like’ things together (so all your pasta and rice in one area, all your tinned meat and fish in another, all your beans together and so on). Check the best before dates and get rid of anything a bit iffy. Remember though that best before is a recommendation – it’s use-by dates that must be kept to. Don’t forget to look in your freezer – again, organise it by putting similar items together – so all meat in one area, bread in another, frozen chips/peas/veg somewhere else. When I’m particularly on top of things, I have a running list of what’s in my freezer, so I don’t have to root around in the frozen wastes to see what I have; it’s written up and pinned next to my kitchen noticeboard. Then you can start to think about a meal plan, beginning first with what you already have. If you need a little inspiration, there are websites that you can plug in your main food item (e.g. tinned tuna) and it will come up with a list of recipes. Lovefoodhatewaste is one that I like – there are plenty of recipes on there, plus lots of information about why it’s good for us and the planet to use up leftover food, tips on thrifty cooking and much more. Bonus tip – if you can, try and think about having a meal where you can make a double portion and freeze the rest – these are fantastic on those days when you really don’t want to cook, just get it out of the freezer, whack it in the microwave to defrost and it will be ready quicker than your local takeaway can deliver.

Write up a list of what you need that’s not already ‘in stock’ and you are ready to go shopping. Which leads me nicely into……

4 – Online grocery shopping

Ordering your shopping online is an amazing convenience. I really love it, and it’s even better now that Aldi have got into the market with ‘click and collect’. It can really help you to save money, because you’re not in the supermarket, wandering the aisles, looking at all the very tempting stuff that somehow then finds its way into your trolley. You do have to be careful not to be drawn in with the messages that pop up about ‘have you seen this special offer?’, or ‘you usually buy this’ – stick to your list! You may have to be organised and book your slot in advance or depending on which supermarket you choose you may be able to book a last minute one. And yes, sometimes the substitutions can be a bit strange (onions instead of white wine anyone? ) and you do have to make sure you’re ordering the right size – I once thought I had an absolute bargain with a pack of Diet Coke that turned out to be the mini cans that you use as a mixer….. BUT – overall, the supermarkets have ALSO got themselves organised (generally) and give a good service.

5 – Cleaning

Having just spent what feels like the whole weekend dealing with household tasks, I feel your pain on this one. Last week got away with me, and I didn’t stick to my daily habit of cleaning, and so it all piled up and was waiting for me this weekend. So last night I sat down and went back to planning out my week, on a day-by-day basis, of cleaning tasks to be done. This is very loosely based on The Organised Mum Method and Flylady whereby the task of keeping on top of your cleaning is split into zones and days. So for me, Monday is cleaning my living room and dining area (which currently is one long room). So I dust, polish where necessary, get rid of dead flowers, water any plants, I might wash throws, I vacuum the floors and look for anything to declutter while I’m cleaning. Tuesday is bedroom day – dust and polish, change sheets, hoover upstairs, clean mirrors etc. I also empty the bins and put the bins out as it’s binman day on Wednesdays! Wednesday is hall day – but as my hall is small I also use this day to do any other jobs, which includes cleaning the bath and shower cubicle, cleaning windows, admin work, making phone calls). Thursday is kitchen day, when all the surfaces get a clean down, I clean out the microwave and toaster, wipe the cupboards and door handles and clean the sink out properly (i.e. put some hot water and disinfectant in, and then clean it with a cream cleanser). I might also wipe out the dishwasher – if I don’t do this weekly, I do it every couple of weeks or so.

Obviously, as I am using the kitchen daily, I will be keeping on top of the daily stuff like clearing away any cooking dishes, filling and emptying the dishwasher, emptying the kitchen bin and the food waste/recycling as needed.

Friday is hard floor cleaning day – so I will vacuum downstairs and the bathrooms, get out my squirty mop for the downstairs LVT floor, and the steamer for the bathroom floors, and get to work. I also check and clean out the fridge, meal plan for the following week and prepare my shopping list.

Through the week, there are some things I will do every couple of days – for example, cleaning down the basins and the toilets, and vacuuming the high traffic areas. I will pop these onto my schedule where I think they need to be done, and where I have the time to fit them in. The important thing is that I don’t have it all to do at the weekend. The other important thing (for me) is that it’s written down, so I have a clear plan for the week ahead and I get the achievement of ticking things off as they are completed! I used to think that doing housework every day would be much more work than doing it once a week, and that the house would never feel clean, but I have been proved wrong. Maybe when you first start, it will take slightly longer to clean daily but as you get into a routine you will definitely speed up, and knocking something off every day means you do not have to spend a huge chunk of your weekend cleaning the house.

6 – Birthday cards and gifts

This, I have to say, is one of the things which, if I am on top of it, makes me feel like I rule the world. If I am not on top of it, I feel like the worst mum/friend/sister/aunty in the world! Hero to zero….. The trick is to plan ahead – use a system (either a calendar, planner, or your phone) to log the birthday of everyone that is important to you, and then put a reminder in your phone or on your planner, a couple of weeks ahead of time, to organise the card and present. I would give yourself the buffer of two weeks to do this rather than one, because then if, for whatever reason you don’t do it two weeks out, you’ve still got a week to get it done. You could set another reminder in your phone if necessary if you didn’t get to it. Another way to manage this could be to buy a stack of cards that are suitable for birthdays and keep them in a box, refilling them every so often – I find that the lower priced shops have some really excellent cards, instead of using more well-known (and higher priced) stores. If you have more money than time, you could also put some money onto an online account (such as Moonpig) annually, or every six months, and then use that to despatch your cards. This is useful if it’s a friend or relative where you don’t buy presents, or they are too far for you to deliver in person. What I’ve started to do recently is to buy all the cards for the upcoming month’s birthdays at the start of the month, usually by shopping at a specific card store. Any of these ways will work, and it will mean that you don’t feel that dread when you realise it’s someone’s birthday in a couple of days and you do not have their card already sorted.

With presents, this is something that may need a little more consideration. I tend to keep a running list through the year as I see things that might be a good birthday idea – for example, something you see on a Facebook or Instagram ad, or your friend mentions something they like. If you were super-organised you could buy them there and then of course – but if not, then buying them at the start of the birthday month is also a good idea. Of course, online stores like Amazon will also deliver presents directly to the recipient – which is especially helpful if they don’t live nearby.

7 – Paperwork organisation

This, for me, is a tricky one. I am still, in this digital age, a fan of paper. I like to have a physical journal or list of things to do to tick off, and I also have paperwork which I really don’t need to keep but still do (estate agent’s booklet on the house I sold 8 years ago, for example). So, writing this for me is quite cathartic, and a bit of a kick up the bum to up my paperwork game!

Start off with checking what comes through your front door and have a method for dealing with mail straight away. Anything urgent should be dealt with immediately, junk mail either straight into recycling or (better still) return to sender so you get taken off the list.

I tend to have a folder where stuff ‘to deal with’ is put, with the plan being that I look at the folder once a week, having set aside an hour to do so. As I say, that’s the plan…..

Household gadget manuals is something that can quickly pile up, and that also takes up a lot of space. But you don’t really need these if you have access to the internet – manuals are usually available online (double check before you throw something away that you think you might need to refer to though!).

Finance paperwork is another thing that can pile up – and sometimes you do need to keep this for a period of time – e.g. payslips. Many employers now have switched to digital versions though, so keep these online if you can (making sure you also have a backup of important files!).

If you have access to a scanner, you could also scan in important documents – and then have a filing system using folders that makes sense to you.

You may still need originals of some documents – e.g. birth certificate etc. Don’t get rid of or digitise these! Have a place to keep them – I have a fireproof portable safe in which I keep my really important documents – passport, birth certificate, divorce paperwork, car ownership documents.

So there you have it – these are the things that make me feel like I’ve got it all together, but I’d love to hear what makes you feel organised! Drop a comment below, or message me on Instagram and tell me your methods!

Instagram

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These are difficult times we are living in through the coronavirus pandemic, and of course a lot of people are worried about money; they may have lost their job, or be worried about what the future will hold, and I totally understand that. Even though these things cost money, many of them were bought in the past, and they continue to make me happy now.  I would never advocate spending money that you don’t have, or spending money if you are worried about your job, but you can also make the most of things you already own, or even look on sites like Freecycle, or eBay, to see if there are free or low cost items that could make a huge difference to your happiness, in your current circumstances.

Books

I know, I know, it’s a digital world now and we should use our Kindle rather than have a book to hold.  I do have some books on my Kindle – most of which were bought at a bargain price (thanks, BookBub ) but to me, there is nothing like the thrill of holding a book in my hands. Snuggling down in bed, which is where I normally do my reading, trying desperately to keep my eyes open while promising myself I’ll read ‘just to the end of this chapter’.  I do love a thriller, but often they will keep me awake at night, which I always regret the next day.  My main go-to though are self development books – I just love them.  I’m going to write a blog post about my favourite books, so keep an eye out for that.  And I know there are cheaper ways to read than actually buying a book, but I do visit my local library now and again – the problem is, I come out loaded with books that I can’t wait to read, and end up renewing them online about three times before finally giving up  and taking them back because I don’t have time!  I really do have a problem with books – but it’s a problem I’m happy to have!  I truly believe that reading can open doors to other worlds, help us escape from the day to day and of course can give us skills and knowledge.  I have always told my son that reading is the key to making it in life, and I absolutely believe that.

iPhone

Yes, there are alternative phones to the iPhone – I had one for a while, a HTC model, and while it was ok, it didn’t bring me half as much pleasure as my iPhone.  Who would have thought that we would have the ability to hold mini computers in our hands, through which we can access all kinds of goodies?  Apps for health, for finance, social media, news, personal contact information, videos, music, podcasts – the list goes on.  Oh of course and we can talk to people…!  One of the things I worry about when the actual zombie apocalypse comes (yes, I am a Walking Dead fan..) is the fact we will no longer be able to use our phones.  And whilst I have an iPhone, which I know isn’t the cheapest, I always shop around for a good deal, and keep my phone far longer than the two or three years that a contract lasts.  And of course as soon as I am out of contract, I buy a cheaper SIM only deal.

Gig tickets

I have seen many, many bands, and almost without fail, going to see them live has made a massive impact on me and brought me so much pleasure.  The first band I saw live were Wham, and I literally could not believe that I was singing at the same time as George Michael.  In fact, I still can’t believe it now – that you are singing along with your musical heroes – at the same time.  Mindblowing.  Many of my favourite tunes have been the soundtrack to my life at different key times, such as The Script when I was going through my marriage breakup.  It really helps to know that other people have faced difficulties in love or life and have come through the other side. Going to gigs is such an amazing experience, music can touch your soul or move you in so many ways – joyful and uplifting, moving and emotional, and it is such a privilege to be able to experience the energy and performance in a live setting.

The Specials, at Coventry Cathedral; July 2019

Help around the house

I’ve been lucky enough to have had the services of a cleaner at various times, and whilst I am happy now to take on the cleaning of my home myself, at times it has been invaluable to have someone else help me by taking on the cleaning task.  For example, when my son was little, my husband was working away and I was studying and working part-time; also when I first got my contracting role after taking my redundancy and had to be at work at 7.30 in the morning (which was a massive shock to the system, I can tell you).  The women that helped me out then made a huge difference to my quality of life – and fair play to them, they were setting up a business and working for themselves, which is no mean feat.  Being a single parent, running my own home, there are always maintenance and improvement jobs to be done, and I can honestly say it gives me so much pleasure to give someone a list of the little jobs that need doing, and to see that list completed after a couple of hours.  It’s a great feeling.  There are some jobs I will attempt myself (I even bought myself a drill..) but sometimes it is much more cost effective to pay for someone else’s skills to get it done quickly.  I’m lucky enough that I know a few good people, particularly one ex-colleague who is very handy, and is happy to earn some extra money for helping me out.  Win win!!

Throws, candles and fairy lights

Inexpensive, but a great way to make your home feel cosy and give you that Hygge feeling.  I really love a Sherpa fleece throw; that underside of fleece really makes you feel that you are snuggling up, almost as if you are in bed but no, it’s just you lounging on your sofa watching the tv!  Candles are a great way to throw a bit of mood lighting; even better if you get scented candles (but not cinnamon – please, never cinnamon!), but you have to buy the quality candles so that they burn well and don’t just burn down the middle leaving you with an outside edge that really gets on your nerves because it hasn’t burned down evenly.  What? Me? Picky?  Nah   And fairy lights, well these are so magical on the Christmas tree, why not add a bit of that magic all year round by arranging them on your mantelpiece, or over a shelf unit, or swirled inside a glass vase – or even wrapped around your bed frame.

Foaming shower gel and ‘posh’ bath gel

This is one way that I can make having a shower feel really luxurious – and the Imperial Leather foamburst gel is the best I have found.  It is rich, lathers well and you don’t need loads to get yourself really clean.  I wouldn’t buy the unicorn or mermaid ones, but that’s just me.  Oh and don’t let your teenage son get his hands on it or you will have none left after three days (speaking from bitter experience..).  Posh bath gel – well for me the ideal is something like Badedas – and I know that isn’t posh for some people, but it definitely was when I was growing up!  During my childhood we used to have this ‘for best’.  That lovely pine smell, oooohhhhh.  But any creamy, luxurious gel will do it – Sanctuary Spa do a lovely one too.

Enjoying a bath like….

photo by Lubomirkin on Unsplash

What have you spent money on that has brought you joy? Let me know!

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